Hodgpodge Tuesday

It’s Tuesday, so that means it’s time for Hodgepodge Tuesday!

The Madison Police Department has reported a recent rash of muggings and robberies, 12 since April. Police remain baffled as to who is responsible for these occurrences. But whoever is behind these crimes, one thing is certain, these are much more than just a series of random isolated incidents. I remember something like this happening in New York about 16 years ago. I don’t want to cause any alarm here, but I think someone in Madison has brought back an old Japanese gang of ninjas known as the Foot Clan. We are a city in need of some heroes. And some people are still complaining about companies illegally dumping toxic waste?

David Blaine, you are a loser. If you are going to go on TV and do a two hour event culminating with you trying to hold your breath underwater for 9 minutes, you’d better make it worth while. I knew better than to watch, but I assume some people did, hoping to see either you break the record, or drown trying. You didn’t do either. What’s up with that?

Barry “The Human Pincushion” Bonds will be hitting 715 soon. I don’t really care, though. Nothing to do with steroids. I just don’t care about someone getting to second place. You’re still the best, Hank.

I was playing Minesweeper today, as I do from time to time, and I finally got a new record, in the Expert level. Minutes later I got a new record for the Intermediate. It’s a Hodgepodge Tuesday miracle! I now stand at 3, 22, 80. Beat that, President Bush.

Did you see this, did you hear about this? Probably not if this concerns you. Students at Gallaudet, the deaf college in Washington D.C. are calling for their new college president to be replaced. I think she’s going to stay, though, so it appears their protests have fallen on deaf ears. From what I’ve heard, it sounds like the issue is that she’s not deaf enough. I guess some deaf people think that ASL and all parts of deaf culture need to be protected and preserved. The thing is, deafness is a handicap. Not being able to hear puts you at a disadvantage. That’s the whole reason you’re in a special school. Kind of like women and the WNBA. If it is possible to compensate for or even fix deafness, I say do it. I have terrible eyesight. Something like 20/800. I don’t know. They stopped trying to measure it. My vision puts me at a considerable disadvantage. But I can compensate for it by wearing glasses or contacts. I have nothing against deaf people. I just don’t think deafness is something that should be valued.

And what’s this I hear about Duke Cunningham and parties involving prostitutes and limos? I can’t wait until I get to Washington.

That’s it for the first edition of Hodgepodge Tuesday. Until next time, Hodgepodgerinos.